All I Ever Wanted
by Artemis of Aquarius
Summary: "Never Cry Werewolf" one shot. Jared muses on his lost love, his lost life and new hope and redemption from Loren.


**All I Ever Wanted**

Jared looked at the clock on his wall, counting every second he had before the change. He stood in his kitchen chopping up vegetables for his late dinner which involved human flesh, anger and violence. There was indeed anger and violence in all the world for him to take. There were enough souls to be salvaged so that he could regain what he had lost so long ago.

_Melissa_

The name echoed in his mind again like the non-stop pounding of his heart. He was sick of waiting, sick of planning, sick of desiring and wishing, sick of everything. After a hundred years he still didn't learn patience. He wanted her, he wanted her back so desperately and there she was only mere feet away but he restrained himself. He wanted her to come to him, he wanted her to remember him. He knows that she remembers him.

_Loren_

Another named in which his heart would beat so quickly for. The moment he saw her he thought time had stopped just for him, just so that a hundred years of cruelty and loneliness wasn't all in vain. He knew that she had returned to him, he always hoped and knew she would. There were no imperfections in Loren that made him doubt for any second that she was indeed Melissa.

It wasn't just her face, of course not. There was indeed more to the soul than just the face or the physical qualities. Though the physical qualities were was Jared first noticed and relished about with her. Loren had that fire in her, that determination, that stubbornness but yet also modesty and decency. That was Melissa in pure human form.

He took out his pocket watch and opened it, not concerned about the time anymore but focused more on that beautiful photograph of his wife. He smiled to himself, remembering the day Melissa gave that to him. His only vexation about the photograph was the fact that it was taken with her hair up. How he would have enjoyed it if her hair hadn't been secured in that restricting bun, how he wanted to see her luscious hair free and surrounding her pale face. He didn't say anything to her though because at that time, it didn't matter when her hair was up or down because he could always see her as she was, alive and free.

She was so young, so fresh, so ripe. He enjoyed her company, her strong willed attitude about anything in life. He remembered what it was like when they made love the first time. It was their wedding night and how virginal she looked in her night gown with her hair all surrounding her lovely face like a portrait in a frame. He had been with women before and how carnal and wanton he was with them. With Melissa, he was gentle because of how much he wanted to savor that moment, how much he loved her and wanted to be different with her because she she was like no other woman he had ever been with.

She wasn't afraid of him at all when they made love. She was quite open and soft and pure. Her fingertips gripping his back, massaging his battle scars as she moaned beneath him. He moved with her, not against her like in a pure dance of love in which they were only expressing the extent of their passion with each other. He tried to be so loving with her, so gentle so that he could also give back the innocence that she was giving to him.

When it was over, she laid in his arms, with such a content smile on her face as her fingertips still explored his body. Her fingertips which laid words across his skin, deeper and much more memorable than any of the scars upon his body.

_It will be like that again,_ Jared declared shutting the watch with sudden movement. The memories which gave him both pleasure and pain at the fact he lost her so quickly and he could do nothing. How long he had despised himself for letting her go like that, how long he wanted to die to be with her. Yet, he couldn't. He felt that he couldn't just die. It wasn't the way he was, wasn't the way he lived.

How wonderful and delightful that his will wouldn't let him give up because it brought him to Loren, it brought him to Melissa.

He was lucky that her brother at least found favor with him because then it would have brought him closer to Loren. He hated how she looked at him with such confusion and fear the first time she stepped in his new home. He hated how serious she was and how desperate she was to drive herself away from him. He hated closing the door after she left.

_Come back to me, _he had thought, staring at his hellhound when he realized his familiar thought that Loren was hot.

He didn't care for that prostitute he had killed nor the other victims. He used to do that for the mere pleasure and fun of it. Now, he saw how empty his life was that it had to be like that. After meeting Loren, he knew nothing would be the same. Of course he would kill for the survival of it, but he saw nothing else to it. He was bored and tired, sick of distractions. He only wanted her, he only wanted to be her. He only wanted her to be with him too. This time, he promised himself that once he had her, he would make sure they would never part again. He only relished at the thought.

Still though, he knew that Loren was strong willed and strong hearted. She was not easy to win over which was definitely another factor that he loved about her. How much he dreamed of life with her for the rest of eternity. Nothing would ever be lost again, no dreams would ever be shattered and no lust that would go unfulfilled. Though he couldn't see Loren as the killer he was, he saw the potential she had be what he was.

_Soon,_ he thought. _That's all I ever wanted. _


End file.
